Thanks For Ruining The Holidays!

You're why we can't have nice things. You know, like holiday parties or season's greetings.

Yes, you.

You, with your snide attitude and nasty declaration that anyone who doesn't shout "Merry Christmas!" is waging war on your personal holiday of choice.

You, with your insistance that everything be done your way, including what type of card President Obama and his family send out. Heaven forbid the leader of the United States dare send out a greeting to the citizens of this country that includes a message to all of them and not only the ones who share your personal beliefs. You, with your hypocritical cries of, "Keep Christ in Christmas!" as you take your children to see Santa and leave out cookies for a man who works miracles and steals the spotlight from the very person whose birthday you want everyone to celebrate.

You, who think that everyone should have to acknowledge your holiday despite the fact you feel no compulsion to acknowldge theirs. In fact, truth be told, you're pretty sure their holiday is made up. It's about as genuine a holiday as Festivus.

I suppose this shouldn't come as a surprise. You've always been this way. You're big on "might makes right" and have a T-shirt that says "My Way Or The Highway." You no longer speak to the cousin who believes that as a grown woman, she should be free to make her own choices. And you refused to attend the wedding of your brother because he had the audacity to marry someone you didn't approve of. (Besides, you are convinced that this country will eventually wise up and make sure unions like his are about as valid as a three-dollar bill.)

Yes, you're why we can't have nice things like happy holidays. Kudos, you. How proud you must be!